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5. Fountains of Wayne - Stacy's Mom


Every male (and female) has thought about having sex with his friend's mother, it's only natural and was just a feeling God intended for all of us to have. I mean the bible clearly encouraged incest but by today's standards one cannot have sex with their mother so they must fuck a friend's mother. I mean clearly this song reaks of Fast Times at Ridgemont High but you know what. We'll let that slide, because man I sure got a boner. For Stacy's mom that is.

4. Bowling For Soup - 1985


Bring me back to a simpler time when everything was oh so fine. Yes remember 1985? When Black Flag got shitty, good bands broke-up, and Disco ruled the world? Yeah fuck that shit, but hey [your never gonna stop me]. Anyways if you don't like U2 or Blondie then you can eat a fat dick because those bands are straight as a arrow. And if your girlfriend fucked all the dudes from Motley Crue then good for her, unless she's obese then well no one should have to indulge in such a tragedy.

3. Blink 182 - What's My Age Again?


Have you ever woken up and you didn't know what your age was? Were you running around naked showing hindu's and christians your male penis? [We started making out, she took off my pants]. I mean amnesia is very normally, fucking Denzel Washington had amnesia and so did the chick from 51st dates. Reminds me about a girl I dated in highschool in fact. She forgot who I was, but then was all over my dick then forgot who I was. Blink 182 knows my life story. Omgomgomgomg.

2. Lit - My Own Worst Enemy


[Can we forget about all the things I said when I was drunk?] Amen to that brother, because all of us have had that moment where we drunk texted a girl, "Hey babeeee whatchuuu doin? :)" "Are you drunk?" "Maybeeeee." "Grow up." "Awwwww :'(" yeah yeah we've all been there. Anyways [please tell me] how great you think sleeping with your clothes on is! I mean personally when I have sex I don't like to take my clothes off (including my boxers), because it gets so cold and everything you know. Swellbow has displayed their homosexuality by covering this great song as a joke song during their sets.

1. Sum 41 - Fat Lip


This is possibly the greatest song ever in the human universe, because I mean when you were a child and heard Fat Lip you were stoked as fuck right? Sum 41 knew your life story, we all [trashed our own house party, because no one came]. Who the fuck wants to act their age? NO ONE. Josh Stamps (Guitarist of Fist Fight on Ecstasy) is the only exception. If you don't know all the lyrics to this song, you clearly had a shitty childhood as Facebook likes to remind everyone on a daily basis with, (Like this if your a 90's baby!). Which in reality is just another way to reign one's own personal supremacy over others in order to call them gay or poser because not enough people liked their status on Facebook.

Written by John Williams